Tuesday, August 2, 2016

My Inner Teenager

Yesterday I had my first week weigh-in for Ideal Protein.

Start: 197
Week 1: 191.7
Down 5.3 lbs

Now that that's out of the way, let's talk experience.

When I have to tell myself "no", I usually battle my inner teenager.  I get pouty (usually internally), and whiny (whyyyyyyyyyy?????) and resentful that everywhere I look are people who are eating and drinking what they want and I have to be strict and focused.  It's not constant, but there are moments that test my abilities to resist temptation.

Some people might experience this when hungry, but if I'm honest with myself, I don't really think that was my problem.  I didn't necessarily feel hungry, and the moments that I did, I was able to do a quick salad that did the trick. For me, it is primarily feeling mentally deprived while ALSO feeling the mental challenge of vigilance toward habit-resets.

This week I encountered two days where I lost my internal resolve to get on track and went off the plan.  Both were social.  One I feel ok about (a glass of wine at an art show reception), and one was a bigger misstep I can't justify.  But I went out of my way to justify it at the time- at a meal with my visiting in-laws, I just convinced myself it wasn't fair to THEM that I was a wet-blanket when we went to a restaurant, so I had off-plan food AND 2 beers.

Yeahhhhh, I did it for them.

Yesterday, I had to admit that to my program coach, and it did not feel good.  And THAT is why I'm doing a supervised program rather than just doing low-carb on my own (which I know how to do).

But, hey, successes!

  • I had 5 days on-plan.
  • I sat at happy-hour last night with a water while everyone else had a couple beers.
  • I lost 5 pounds!
  • I got on here to blog.
  • I have a plan for how to make this week more accountable.
  • I did a better job planning dinners and lunches this week, and did a lot of the grocery and farmer's market shopping already.
So, letting go of my mistakes and moving ahead it is.

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